Anonymous: Random question.. If there were to be a mass zombie apocolypse which signs would take each roles to survive and who do you think would be the top 3 most likely to survive??

astrologymarina:

  • Aries: The hero who runs up to the zombies and dies first
  • Taurus: The one who hides and hoards groceries
  • Gemini: The one who tries to contact other survivors by connecting a microwave to a radio or some shit
  • Cancer: The one who crams all the surviving children together and builds a little orphanage
  • Leo: The king of the apocalyptic world who makes a throne out of food cans and old curtains and stuff and has people working for them
  • Virgo: The nurse who heals all the little wounds and makes bandages and stuff
  • Libra: The one who tries to keep the peace when people start going crazy and gets shot while jumping between the opponents
  • Scorpio: The one who kills zombies and eats them to survive but ends up being infected by the virus
  • Sagittarius: The one who tries to reach the still human part in the zombies by talking to them and calling them by their former name but fails and dies
  • Capricorn: The one who tries to build a police force to get everything under control
  • Aquarius: The one who tries to find a cure for the virus and experiments on himself
  • Pisces: The one who sacrifices themselves for their friends end gets bitten

Top 3 most likely to survive:

  1. Taurus
  2. Aquarius
  3. Capricorn

The actual zodiac signs

fabulink:

Aries: really fucking arrogant
Taurus: bossy as fuck
Gemini: two-faced spawn of satan
Cancer: kinda nice and cries a lot
Leo: talks way too much
Virgo: overanalyzes everything
Libra: probably hella boring
Scorpio: has a collection of knives
Sagittarius: keep your opinions to yourself
Capricorn: lucifer’s servant
Aquarius: hella weird and judgemental
Pisces: way naive and probably gay

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unflaws:

I slept almost all day but almost is never enough

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dancybutt:

lnstagrandma:

how to piss someone off:

leave the door open

image

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whoatakeiteasyman:

no mom, do not ask that relative if they want to talk to me next on the phone.

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intriguers:

how many calories do I burn when I run away from my problems?

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matthewsagan:

This is the DNA of a self-identified homosexual person viewed under 10000x microscopic magnification. If you look closely you can see the DNA has unique characteristics, which supports the theory that there is a biological basis for homosexuality.

interesting

(Source: matthewsagan, via ugly)

im still exhausted from beating all the other sperms

(Source: suicide-scars, via ugly)

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